tough choices in marriage

08 , 17 2014

Grass is Greener on the Other Side?

By |2014-08-17T18:15:39-04:00August 17th, 2014|Marriage Communication|0 Comments

“They could fall in love with fresh, new people, or they could have the courage and humility to tear off some essential layer of themselves and reveal to each other a whole new level of otherness, a level far beyond what sort of music they liked. It seemed to her everyone had too much self-protective pride to truly strip down to their souls in front of their long-term partners. It was easier to pretend there was nothing more to know, to fall into an easygoing companionship. It was almost embarrassing to be truly intimate with your spouse; how could you watch someone floss one minute, and the next minute share your deepest passion or most ridiculous, trite little fears? It [...]

12 , 2 2012

Natural Order of Things

By |2015-02-04T14:07:35-05:00December 2nd, 2012|Marriage Communication, Save My Marriage|0 Comments

A bridge is built For a minute it's new Then a crack begins Some rust shows through The shiny paint peels The cables fray What was perfect and true Starts to fade away It's just the natural order of things Without constant care And endless repair A bridge standing tall Will topple and fall It's just the natural order of things A garden is sown For a time it will bloom Then a weed takes root And steals more room The leaves go dry Young buds fall away What was lush and green Turns a tangle of grey It's just the natural order of things Without tender care And patience to spare The garden you tend Will come to an [...]

01 , 4 2012

When the Vow Breaks, Part V: Childless

By |2015-02-04T14:20:36-05:00January 4th, 2012|Marriage Communication, Marriage Help, Marriage Help Featured, Save My Marriage|0 Comments

Disappointment is a much underrated emotion.  Left unchecked, it can devolve to disenchantment and down the slippery slope to “I don’t care anymore.”  It can even lead to suicidal ideation. Bill and Mary were childless because she was barren.  After marrying in their mid-20’s they waited six years, in deference to career development and financial solvency, before trying to become pregnant.  On the proud day they became homeowners (it was Bill’s 32nd birthday), they stood dreamily in was to be the nursery.  “Shall we paint it pink?” Mary said.  “Blue, green or yellow. Let’s get pregnant,” Bill retorted with a loving squeeze. Now, approaching their 12th anniversary, they reported that there was no joy left, no sparks either, nothing to [...]

12 , 28 2011

When The Vow Breaks, Part IV – She Doesn’t Even Recognize Me.

By |2015-02-04T14:21:23-05:00December 28th, 2011|Marriage Communication, Marriage Help, Marriage Help Featured|0 Comments

Sometimes the vow breaks and it’s nobody’s fault, unless you want to blame the victim of Alzheimer’s for contracting the disease. No sane person would do that. Vern and his wife Sandy married at 22, the day both of them graduated college. She worked to put him through grad school and he became a career university professor. The marriage ended nearly 60 years later when Sandy died, leaving Vern and two adult children, five grandchildren, and one great-grandchild. Theirs was a model “great American romance.” Almost. Sandy spent the last two decades of her life battling Alzheimer’s. It was a losing battle, soon requiring full-time in-home care and then, when she almost burned the house down, a pain-filled decision to [...]

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