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Blog2020-07-13T13:07:48-04:00

What a Healthy Love Relationship Looks Like

When I say, “I love me” or “I love you,” what do I mean? I love me. My need to do my own thing, and my right to be me, are immeasurably precious to me. The thoughts I think, the emotions I feel, the words I speak, and the actions I take are mine. They all are freely chosen by me, and for them I am totally responsible. Where satisfying or not, they are my experiment in actualizing my own personhood, my opportunity to learn from my own experience, my expression of my love … for me. I also love you. Your need to do your own thing, and your right to be you, are equally precious to me. The [...]

Grass is Greener on the Other Side?

“They could fall in love with fresh, new people, or they could have the courage and humility to tear off some essential layer of themselves and reveal to each other a whole new level of otherness, a level far beyond what sort of music they liked. It seemed to her everyone had too much self-protective pride to truly strip down to their souls in front of their long-term partners. It was easier to pretend there was nothing more to know, to fall into an easygoing companionship. It was almost embarrassing to be truly intimate with your spouse; how could you watch someone floss one minute, and the next minute share your deepest passion or most ridiculous, trite little fears? It [...]

Happiness the other side of divorce?

“It's quite common for people in an unhappy marriage to think that happiness is just on the other side of divorce. It's ironic. When we're single, we'll be happy when we meet someone. Once we're married, we think we'll be happy when we're single.” --Mort Fertel

Natural Order of Things

A bridge is built For a minute it's new Then a crack begins Some rust shows through The shiny paint peels The cables fray What was perfect and true Starts to fade away It's just the natural order of things Without constant care And endless repair A bridge standing tall Will topple and fall It's just the natural order of things A garden is sown For a time it will bloom Then a weed takes root And steals more room The leaves go dry Young buds fall away What was lush and green Turns a tangle of grey It's just the natural order of things Without tender care And patience to spare The garden you tend Will come to an [...]

Distorted Sense of Self

“Narcissism and paranoia are flip sides of the same distorted sense of self-importance.” -- Sue Grafton in “’P’ is for Peril”

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